And So It Begins…


So what can I say about the blip that was Thursday?

I’ll start with good news, that was if you get bored half way down you’ve heard that baby is OK. We had an emergency scan yesterday, and we saw his/her heartbeat and found out that we’re roughly eight weeks pregnant.

Yesterday I woke in pain; the pain was more intense than the growing pain I’ve been experiencing all week. Well, that’s if it was growing pain. Who knows. I don’t. Yesterday was different, one point it felt like a stab to the gut which made me scream and have a wiggle around the sofa. I don’t know want caused me to pass out, heat or the pain or the fact I was feeling very strange and lightheaded. This point I phone the early pregnancy ward as it says to do so on your notes, this was a faffle in itself, every time I phone the woman I was meant to talk to she was busy. So I finally left my number for her to call back.

Once we finally chatted, she suggested booking me in for a scan that next morning, but as I pointed out to her, I was concerned about the pain and how I just wasn’t feeling right. She told me if I was that bad to go to A&E or ring my GP. Not wanting a huge fuss, I went for the GP option but couldn’t get through, and I tried the main midwives office but no answer. This point I was in a state, combined with this pain and the hormones. I sat sobbing on the stairs as I phoned the Man at work. We decided to go to A&E, a close friend came and sat with the boys and me until he got back. All that time I sat on a chair, I just couldn’t lay down as the pain felt better when I had my knees up towards me.

Was the right time to hit up A&E, it was thankfully rather quiet, and we didn’t have to wait around that long until we were sent into triage. This is where we found my blood pressure to be low, and my heart was going crazy, we talked about SVT, and that crazy heart of mine sank. Here I am, in the hospital because of the pain I’m in, and a previous nightmare comes straight back to haunt me. I got SVT towards the end of the last pregnancy; it wasn’t a pleasant experience. I was put straight into A+E so that could hook me up to an ECG and figure out what to do with me, they decided to put me up to the gynaecology ward before it closed at 3.

Gosh, didn’t I get the impression I wasn’t wanted, came up with the trolley doubled over in pain and all I could hear was the head ward sister going loopy because she didn’t know I was coming but the doctor has requested I came up there because he wanted to see me. The lovely nurse who was with me in A&E left me and said the nurse would be along to see me and to say hello, I never did see her. Guess she didn’t like the fact I was brought up so close to her finishing time. After a while we had two doctors come in, one female, one male both doctors who I assume were gynaecologists. The male I didn’t like, and I pray that he was still learning, especially his bedside manner. Him chucking instantly into a this could be an ectopic pregnancy, and if things don’t look right, we’re shipping you straight to the theatre to get it out of you. Yeah, the way he put all that wasn’t nice at all, he can count his blessings I’m at a point in pregnancy/parenthood where I know all sorts of situations, that I knew this could be a case. Any first timer would have been sat there crapping themselves and probably distraught at this point. I know I was sat in tears.

I was asked so many questions, from when I stopped Breastfeeding (which of course I’ve not) to if I knew I was pregnant. That was repeatably asked, and I told them that I had taken two tests a couple of weeks ago and followed it up with a ClearBlue dating one, the male doctor had never heard of these, so the female one explained. I was told what would happen, that I would have a cannula put in, blood taken and my HCG level was taken. I was also going to have a scan to see what was going on with the baby. Because I wasn’t allowed to eat or drink, I had fluids attached to keep me going.

This point I met a new doctor, who I assumed is the surgeon who sorts out things when they go wrong. Especially with the lovely gory details, he gave me of what a woman’s body looks like after the whole egg has fertilised, etc. I had returned to where I was at the start of my last pregnancy, where the doctor declared my blood pressure low and blue lighted me off to the hospital. Though that experience had shown me that all could be OK with the baby and thankfully everything was. A pattern seems to be emerging in my pregnancies where I seem to be ill or experience something continually, but thankfully baby is always healthy. This is brilliant, and what I need to remember when I’m taking a hit.

He explored my insides using an endovaginal probe, something which is used instead of the other handheld scanner when the pregnancy is early on. They have condoms inserted over them; I remember the doctors flapping around trying to find one. I was tempted to joke how using one of those wouldn’t have got me in this mess, but I resisted. Thanks to a good poke with this probe, he discovered my left ovary was what was creating this pain. You should have heard the yelp I gave when he poked at it, it was strange to see him doing this on the screen and feeling that pain. I was also told that I had a tilted womb, we didn’t chat more bout this, but my research leads me to believe this will correct itself around the 12-week mark.

Sadly the pain will continue but will stop soon, was told to take paracetamol to see me through it. The SVT I’m to follow up with my GP, and I know my consultant in the last pregnancy explored this herself and sent me for heat packs. Guess if I weren’t already referred to the consultant, this would have got me referred.

This all of top of the sickness, the tiredness has me wanting to reach the breaking point. I’m struggling and need to hit a good point soon. I wanted to enjoy my last pregnancy; I wanted to experience a ‘normal’ pregnancy for the first time. I don’t want to be waiting for permission from a consultant for my planned homebirth; I don’t want all the extra scans, the attention and the appointments. I just want to be normal.