Who knows? Yesterday I experienced some more Braxton Hicks, and I woke with these again at 6am this morning. My tummy feels so tight and with each BH that comes about it’s becoming more uncomfortable. I feel like her head has dropped down even more and I’m feeling pain in my groin area. It’s unsettling not quite knowing what’s going on. But then I do. But then I don’t. Anyone who’s ever been in this exact place knows what I’m going on about.
They’ve continued throughout the day; I can feel and see my tummy go so very hard when they come about. The man has come home because of this uncertainty to what’s happening. Which I’m thankful for as it turns out the toddler is on some pooping mission today. As the day progresses and they continue, I’m getting rather bored and fed up of them. I was going to go into the bath to attempt to soothe them, but then I had a sudden urge to clean the bathroom. Thought that would be a great time to get my steamer out the box to tackle the tiles with. By the time I had
watched the husband put together the steamer, I was sleepy.
Now I’ve reevaluated my plan of not doing anything and wanting to spend the next couple of weeks on bed rest. I’m determined to get to 41 weeks until I see any signs of labour coming about. I want her to concentrate on spending this time putting on lots of weight to make everyone happy. Which is then why I think I’m feeling so confused and lost to this experience right now.
Previous pregnancies I would be lapping this up, bouncing on that gymball and taking part in all the old wives tales that could bring on labour. I would be praying that the BH would turn into contractions, that everything was starting and that I wouldn’t be far off meeting our daughter. I’m the total opposite this time. I’ve not even sorted out my gymball, and the last thing I want to be doing is encouraging baby to come out.
Trying to figure out why I’m feeling like this, why I want her to stay put is making me even more emotional than what I already am. Is it the fact once this is over, that’s it for my body? It will never carry a baby again, at least that’s the plan. Something I’ve not given much thought to but then that’s because I just have that overwhelming sense of feeling that our family will be complete once she’s here. I’m leaning towards the fact this ‘growth’ business is a constant play on my mind. Something I’ve not been able to stop thinking about.
Is that going to ruin labour for me? I don’t want to spend it all just waiting for that end result, for weight which makes everyone happy. I’m trying to be so strong, trusting my body like I’ve always done. Like a woman should. It’s those voices. All the comments which go against my own. Playing over and over. That negativity has rubbed off on me, and it seems I’m going to be taking it into labour with me at this rate.
We have another growth scan on Thursday, here’s hoping she’ll hang around until then and maybe show them that all she needed was these last few weeks to be at that weight which will apparently satisfy them.